i'm feelingless.. moodless... to define that. i'm actually dont have any mood or feeling at the moment. i dunno what or how should i feel now.. I guess to define that. LOST is the better word, or maybe CONFUSED.
i dunno.. i remembered i posted something about 'i dunno' before it's about we will never know what we want and there's always thousands of thousands of 'i dunno'.. after so long i still feel the same.. I DUNNO... guess i'm not moving forward at all.... i just spinning at the same spot.. at the same location... i see ppl around me moving forward.. having some much change in life.. relationship.. work.. business.. but i still remain at the same point.. end of the day.. i will be a loser... a loser of LIFE.... time move on.. by right LIFE will follow together... or should i say.. TIME will carry LIFE foward.. but somehow.. my LIFE is stagnant, it never been carried forward by TIME dunno since when...
what kinda change in life that i need to help me trigger this moving forward spark..... sigh..
Friday, March 26, 2010
Saturday, March 20, 2010
First post in my new blog 27 onwards... 2010
this is the year of 2010, and i am 27 this year. i used to have few blogs before and reduced to only one which i just deleted and this is going to be my new blog.
i had lived my life for 27 years plus now, am i living every moment of it or the time just went pass me without even noticing. i'm guessing that im the latter. i feel meaningless and dead-like at the moment or maybe at this period of time ever since a few months back. "what am i doing? what i wanna do? is this what i want?" i keep asking myself these few questions and i just can't get any answer of it.
i wanna find myself of a goal, a direction that i can rely on and move forward. i'm not moving any where now.. i hate this feeling, the feeling of lost.
Just back from a small gathering with my fren PF and KP in Freestyle cafe at my hometown SB. Noticed that the topic we talk about is no longer study, no longer gf/bf but about how to run tax. KP has become a very successful businessman and PF is very good in her accounting firm. they were talking actually and i was there listening and dont really care or dont even know much about what they talked about. They all have their goals to achieve. i feel jealous and hopeless, jealous because i wish i know what i wanna do now and which where i wanna go, and i am hopeless because i really dunno how and where.
Been getting a lot of lectures and advices from my frens; Stephy, Rachel and few of my frens at work. but somehow i just can't make up my mind. and i'm still wondering... sigh.. 11.59pm
i had lived my life for 27 years plus now, am i living every moment of it or the time just went pass me without even noticing. i'm guessing that im the latter. i feel meaningless and dead-like at the moment or maybe at this period of time ever since a few months back. "what am i doing? what i wanna do? is this what i want?" i keep asking myself these few questions and i just can't get any answer of it.
i wanna find myself of a goal, a direction that i can rely on and move forward. i'm not moving any where now.. i hate this feeling, the feeling of lost.
Just back from a small gathering with my fren PF and KP in Freestyle cafe at my hometown SB. Noticed that the topic we talk about is no longer study, no longer gf/bf but about how to run tax. KP has become a very successful businessman and PF is very good in her accounting firm. they were talking actually and i was there listening and dont really care or dont even know much about what they talked about. They all have their goals to achieve. i feel jealous and hopeless, jealous because i wish i know what i wanna do now and which where i wanna go, and i am hopeless because i really dunno how and where.
Been getting a lot of lectures and advices from my frens; Stephy, Rachel and few of my frens at work. but somehow i just can't make up my mind. and i'm still wondering... sigh.. 11.59pm
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